The glory of the 60's

Just nu sitter jag och kollar pa Krakguldet. Nog for att jag ar ett inbitet fan av Kullamannen och ser den tillsammans med min syster minst 3 ganger om aret, Kragguldet har jag faktiskt aldrig sett.
Produktionsar 1969
And that's how i like it.

Plus att staffan Hallerstam maste va den sotaste 12 aringen i varldshistorien...aven om han nu borde va typ..53

Kullamannen borde dock vara obligatorisk i varje svensk uppvaxt (produktionsar 1967..even better maha)

You know who you are.

When you kiss me on the midnight street
Sweep me off my feet
Singin ain't this life so sweet.

Sail away with me honey
I put my heart in your hand
Sail away with me honey now, now, now
Sail away with me honey, what will be will be
I wanna hold you now, now, now

Sackvillious

Om ungefar 1,5 vecka sa har jag varit i kanada i 7 manader. 7 MANADER. Jag kommer ihag paniken jag hade forra aret over hur jag skulle hantera Kanada, ungefar samma tid som rullar pa nu. Ibland sa far jag liksom inte runt mitt huvud om det. Kanada, Sackville. Jag alskar Sackville. Det ma va en liten skittown som inte har sa mycket att erbjuda, men pa nat satt sa har den verkligen fangat mitt hjarta. Jag alskar nar man gar fran skolan in till centrum (som tar typ 30 minuter ) och en tant gar forbi med nagra hundar, hon kollar upp, ler och sager ett glatt "hello hello" aven om det nu ar blask och regn ute.

Eller faktumet att man ar igenkand pa Bridge Street cafe, och nar man far "the couches" att sitta i. Gud vad jag alskar dom. Dom ar sa nedsittna och mjuka att sa fort man nuddar tyget med rumpan sa ar det banne mig som att landa pa grona moln.

Jag langtar efter Sverige, det gor jag verkligen. Men inget har fatt mig att vaxa sa mycket som Kanada har fatt. Home is where your heart is. Det finns plats for bade Kanada och Sverige i mitt hjarta. Det finns plats for mycket i mitt hjarta.

Sa lange Drew ar mitt hjarta sa kan jag bo vart som helst.

magsjuka. eller, kalla det vad ni vill.

Jag har fatt ateruppleva den dar mumsiga kanslan med en riktig magsjuka. Det va langesen vi sags faktiskt, men den sade glatt hej igen "langesen vi sags va! vad trevligt att se dig igen!"

jatte trevligt. Verkligen.

fan, nu har jag ont i magen igen. Jeez. det har kommer aldrig att ga. Onska mig lycka till till nattens somn.

- nonexistent.

Kanada

Pa begaran av Louise, Har har vi Justin Thomas :P Random info: det ar hans tvillingsyster pa bilden, dom ar del av Fyrlingar. JEEEZ.

Decleration of Independence

My declaration of independence. I've broken up with Ed.

" If you were battling cancer, would you try to do it alone? would you refuse to see a doctor, convinced that you could save yourself? would you hide your disease from friends and family, refusing to recieve their support?"

"I thought i was weak if i could not solve my "little" problem on my own. After all, i had done everything else in my life on my own. Why should this be any different?"

all i want to do at this moment is to purge. Get everything out. It shouldn't be there. And you're disgusting Ed says, Ms Perfectionist whispers that i should just be quiet. If no one knows about this, no one will know you have a problem. Flush water so no one will hear you, get it out.

Ed is like the abusive boyfriend you're too scared to leave. Because you're worthless if you'd leave him. He's what making you real, what's making you special. He's like the friend who likes to tell you he's your best friend when you feel totally alone, but not for the good, just to abuse you're feelings "no one would ever like you if i wasn't here with you"

Be Real has beginning to mean something else to me by now, Be Real should be what you see me as.

Ed.

has made me

block out feelings

purge

never feel satisfied, everyone are always better

harmed people close to me

change my morals

have endless worry

think that beauty is for others, not for me

insecurity, not being able to do anything without sweating, apologizing, regretting

You're a fucking low life and i hate you. I hate you for what you've done with me, i hate because you stop me, i hate you because every time i see food i cant think of anything else than whatever i should after, i hate you because you make me cry. I hate you because every time I've purged you tell me I've done something good, but instead that emptiness i'm feeling is just a big hole. You're never satisfied and i'm never good enough. You've made me think that every time i lie to people i do them a favor, i save them from problems or make me think "what you dont have any problems, you're keeping up the good work, that's what you do. If you disobey me, you'd be nothing, no one would like you"

How dare you to be involved in my life. How dare you to be within me.

ED. Eating Disorder. Good Bye. Hello Me.

OS

Vi maste ju iaf ha varldens sotaste langdskidor lag.